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Please Stop Asking Me Where I See Myself in 5 Years

21 May

passionately-curious-goal-setting

I really do hate it.

“The” question…

Where do you see yourself in five years?

Apparently, everyone wants to know.

Have a job interview??? I can almost bet my left hand that someone will ask you.

Go to a networking event??? It’s more than likely.

I’ve been hit with this question more times than I can count.

And every time, I’m sure that I’ve disappointed the person asking with my answer.

Because here’s my answer…

I have no idea.

Now before you start thinking that I lack ambition, understand that I’ve read tons about why goal setting is good. I’ve also read about why goal setting is bad.

I get both sides of the arguement.

But when it comes to where I see myself in 5 years, my answer’s still the same.

I have no idea.

I never grew up wanting to be something specific. I never grew up wanting to be a doctor or a nurse or an astronaut or an engineer.

I don’t know why, exactly, but I just didn’t.

The only thing I DID know was that whatever it was that I ended up chossing as a profession…I wanted to like it.

I wanted to be good at it, and I wanted to enjoy it.

So where do I see myself in 5 years?

I can’t tell you exactly what job I see myself holding, but I CAN tell you that I see myself working at a job that I love. Working somewhere that allows me to use my talents appropriately. One that lets me bring the best of myself to the table, and one that lets me use that to help other people.

When it comes to my career, I guess I’ve chosen a less-than-conventional path. Rather than focusing on one specific discipline, I think that there are lots of jobs that I could be good at and happy with.

I don’t have ONE specific dream job. I don’t have ONE specific job that I aspire to have one day- one that if I never get, I’ll be devastated.

That’s just me.

And while some people may think that makes me unfocused, I like to think that it makes me more flexible.

And in today’s super-unstable job market, that’s probably not such a bad thing.

It’s just kind of funny, really, becuase it seems that people expect us to have it all figured out by the time we graduate college.

graduation-geny-millennials

Yep! We did it!

By then, OBVIOUSLY, we should know what our dream job will be. We should know where we want to be in 5…10…15 years.

And again, if you don’t, some people think you lack focus.

But the truth of it all is that some people NEVER figure that out. People spend their entire lives figuring out what they like…what they don’t like…what they’re passionate about.

It’s a process of trial and error.

So if you’re like me and don’t know exactly where you’ll be 5 years from now, don’t worry, you’ll figure it out as you go.

Just make sure to enjoy the ride.

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Yes, Failure is an Option

15 May

Last night, I was sitting on my couch stuffing my face with strawberries and Nutella when I came across this Domino’s commercial…

And you know what?

I loved it.

Because it was probably the most refreshing thing I’ve seen in a really long time.

Now I know you’re probably thinking, “what the heck is so awesome about a pizza commercial??”

Thing is… it wasn’t about the pizza.

It was about the company, and its culture.

A company that’s okay with admitting that it’s not perfect.

A company that’s okay with accepting failure.

A company that’s willing to learn from that failure and then makes changes.

I don’t know…maybe I’m crazy, but I really liked their honesty.

Because that honesty is really hard to come by these days.

True. Story.

It seems that organizations spend way too much time trying to be the best…trying to be perfect.

AKA… no failure allowed.

So when failure does naturally happen at some point or another, corporate execs spend more time pointing fingers than on actually learning from that failure and continuing to make progress.

I guess that’s why I like this commercial so much.

Because if more companies embraced a culture that’s okay with failure…that sees the value in learning from things that don’t necessarily work out…maybe employees would go out on a limb more often.

Maybe there’d be more innovation.

Maybe we’d actually find solutions to most of our problems.

But we don’t, because we’re scared.

We don’t because, again… most organizations punish people who venture from the norm and then fail.

That’s not cool, and quite frankly, we’re not gunna get anywhere in life with an attitude like that.

So props to you, Domino’s, for being smart enough to say, “hey, we’re not perfect…and we’re fine with that.”

That’s the kind of company I’d like to work for one day…

One that’s not putting on a front.

One that’s honest and sincere.

One that’s accepted that not only is failure an option, but failure is necessary in order to experience growth.

Way to go, Domino’s. You’ve got my attention.

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My Problem With All This Talk About the New Year

30 Dec

2014

With just a couple more days before the New Year, there’s a lot of talk about making resolutions.

Now I personally think resolutions are great, that’s not what I have an issue with.

Here’s what really frustrates me…

Sure, 2014 is full of promise. It’s a chance to start over or simply start something new.

But as the New Year approaches, we find ourselves making wishes.

We find ourselves begging and pleading…

2014… please be good to me.

And then when 2014 doesn’t turn out to be as good as you’d hoped for, suddenly it’s 2014’s fault. Suddenly you find yourself hoping for 2015…probably sometime around March.

But that’s kind of crazy, because a year is just a year.

What you put into that year… that’s what makes the difference.

You can have a terrible year, or you can have a good year.

Heck, you can have the best year of your life.

But it’s entirely up to you.

You won’t lose those 20 pounds you’re hoping you’ll lose without eating right and exercising.

You won’t land that new job if you’re not working on your resume and sending it out to potential employers.

You won’t make your relationship better if you sit in front of your new PS4 every night.

I don’t know how it happened or why it happened, exactly, but it seems that we’ve come to enjoy playing the role of victim in our everyday lives.

When something bad happens, it’s not our fault.

And when something good happens, it’s only because we got really lucky.

But my question, I guess, is the following: is there any personal accountability anymore?

We’re looking to 2014 as if it’s this magical place of hope and joy…

A place where suddenly we have more money and have better relationships and we’re just overall much happier.

But it’s just a freaking year.

It’s just a number.

After 1 comes 2 and after 2013 comes 2014.

Your 2014 will be what you make of it.

If you put effort into it, chances are, it’ll be a great year for you.

And if you sit back hoping that good things are just going to magically happen to you, then I’m sure you’ll find yourself disappointed.

So use this time wisely.

What I love the most about this time right before the New Year is that it’s an opportunity to reflect on the things that have happened over the past 365 days.

I ask myself a series of questions…

What’s been awesome?

What really sucked?

How can I do better?

What do I need to work on?

What do I want?

But most importantly…

How can I make that happen?

Because at the end of the day, you can make all the wishes you want while eating your grapes on New Years Eve, but if you don’t realize that the success of 2014 is up to YOU, you’ll just be making the same wishes next year.

So make your new year count.

Make it the best one by far.

Make it so good that when 2015 comes along you’re just so damn proud of yourself.

Because you were responsible for it.

Because you put forth the effort.

Because you went after everything you wanted.

And you got it.

Hope your new year is absolutely wonderful and that 2014 brings you the determination to be the very best version of yourself.

Really, there’s nothing better than that. xoxo, Kayla

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What to Do When You Take a Leap of Faith and Fail

15 Oct

never give up

Today’s Guest Post was written by Alison Horner. I’m thrilled that I was able to connect with her, and that she’s decided to share her story with us. Here’s a post for anyone who’s been scared to take a risk lately…Enjoy!

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It was July.  Hot.  I was sitting on a curb in DC in business casual attire during my lunch break, sweating not only from the summer sun, but also from the decision I’d been rolling over in my mind for the past few weeks.

I wanted to leave my secure paycheck to start my own business.  I wanted to do work that was meaningful and challenging and more ‘me’.

“What will you do if you fail?” my coach asked me.

“I’ll probably get a different job to fill in,” I replied.

I decided soon thereafter to take the plunge and give it a go.  I handed my boss my two week’s notice, and I tasted sweet, sweet freedom.  

Then reality set in.

I didn’t know what to do with my new workdays to be effective as a business owner.  I didn’t know how to get clients.  And I wasn’t figuring it all out fast enough.

As my savings began to dwindle, I realized I was up against the worst case scenario my coach had asked me about.  I was failing.

What’s interesting is that I didn’t wind up homeless or penniless or in any of the other dreadful fantasies our fears can create.  

Instead, I picked up my head and did what I’d previously told my coach.  

I found another job to cover my living expenses.  It was a position with some flexibility and a clear end time, both of which I hoped would provide me with the opportunity to learn how to run my business successfully.

It worked.  I eventually reached the point of once again working full-time on my business.  Only this time, I had a few years of part-time experience under my belt to inform my actions.  Instead of wondering what I ought to be doing with my days to grow my business, I had overflowing to-do lists of ideas I wanted to try and tactics I had learned.

When I look back on my younger self, the one who jumped into the unknown so hopefully and, yes, so naively, I have to shake my head and smile.  I shake my head because she was blatantly unaware of what she didn’t know.  But I smile because of her courage to take a leap, to risk failure, and to act on pursuing her dreams.  She understood that she might be making a mistake, but she was willing to try anyway, to learn, and to revise her plans as needed.

That first step of leaving an ill-fitting job in pursuit of my own business set me on a course that I never gave up on.  I stuck with my dream even when it looked like it had failed.  And while mine isn’t an immediate fairy tale success story, it is a story of success through persistence and perseverance.

So go ahead, take a risk.  

Ask yourself the questions my coach asked me.

What’s the worst that can happen?  What are you going to do if that worst case scenario happens?  

And then follow-up with the question that matters most.

What are you going to do after that?

My answer was to keep trying, and that’s what made all the difference.

Alison Elissa Horner specializes in helping people figure out their career direction. You can sign up to receive free tips on navigating your career at www.alisonelissa.com.  Alison is also currently offering a free telecourse called ‘Creating a Winning Career Plan’.  For more information and registration go to www.alisonelissa.com/creating-a-winning-career-plan/.

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How To Make Better Decisions

16 Sep

When I was younger, I almost killed my sister.

And that would have been a shame, because I really LIKE my sister.

Here’s how the story goes…

I was 7….she was 5… I was bored…and I had a GENIUS idea!

“Brittney!!! Come here!! I’m going to put you in the laundry basket and push you down the stairs! It’s going to be so much fun!”

At that time, she did whatever I told her to do, so she happily sat in the laundry basket and I then pushed her to her probable death.

About 2.3 seconds later, I had one of those “OH-CRAP” moments.

And as she nearly flipped upside down, she looked like this.

britt

(Yes, that’s my sister, and yes she’s going to kill me for posting that.)

Luckily, I was somehow able to stop her from flipping over.

Then I panicked and I did what kids do when they know they’ve done something awful…

I turned to my sister and pleaded, “DON’T TELL MOM.”

So in light of my failure to make a good decision that day, I’ve put together a few suggestions for making better decisions… and I hope they’ll be helpful.

1. Take Time to Think Things Through

Alright guys. Face it. A lot of us tend to make rash decisions. Not always, but sometimes. We have these lightbulb moments! and we think our ideas are fabulous! and we act, usually, without thinking too much about them.

Had I taken some time to think about pushing my sister down the stairs, I probably would have come to the conclusion that playing with our Barbies was a much better afternoon activity.

2. Seek Advice from People Who Matter

Now this is a big one. Had I gone and asked my mom what she thought about my wonderful idea, she would have ever-so-nicely told me that I was a crazy lunatic.

When we’re making decisions in life, no matter how old we are, it’s not a bad idea to seek advice from people who matter. From people with good opinions and insight. It’s a great way to get some additional perspective just to make sure we’re not missing anything.

3. Think About ALL Possible Consequences

Now I’m not completely positive, but I’m pretty sure that I wasn’t thinking about the consequences of my super-wonderful-great-fun idea.

The only thing on my mind was:

YAYY! This is going to be AWESOME.

So before we make decisions, it’s probably a good idea to consider ALL possible consequences.

What can possibly happen?

Who can this possibly affect?

What is this going to cost me?

Taking some time to answer these questions will make sure you clearly think about the possible negative consequences. Then, you’ll be in a better position to make a sane decision.

4. Ask Yourself WHY You Want to Do Something

Why you want to do something is a very important part of making a decision. So go ahead and ask yourself why you wanna do it.

If your answer is, “Oh, I don’t know. Because I’m bored.”

That’s a bad answer.

So don’t do whatever it was that you were thinking about doing.

You don’t make big decisions just because you’re bored.

Instead, go make yourself a sandwich or something.

5. Follow Some Kind of Basic Decision-Making Model

Although you might find it a bit dorky, it’s extremely helpful to follow a basic decision-making model.

Here’s one that I just learned in my leadership and decision-making class taught by the best professor I’ve ever had:

a. Define the problem.

b. Generate alternatives.

c. Decide.

d. Implement.

e. Evaluate.

Following some kind of logical reasoning when making decisions is a whole lot better than just doing things because you think they’ll be fun. Or because it’s the first thing you can think of. Or because you’re bored. Or just because it’s what everyone else is doing.

So from now on, whenever I have a big decision to make, I’ll think about the time I almost killed my sister and I’ll use some of these tools to make better decisions.

Because again, I do like my sister.

I’d be really bored without her.

Picture1

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Finishing What We’ve Started

29 Aug

finish

I want you guys to think about something for a second…

Over the past year, how many projects have you left unfinished?

How many super-awesome ideas have you had that you’ve just kind of forgotten about?

How many times have you said that you wanted to do something…and yet you haven’t gotten around to doing it?

It’s not a fun feeling, is it? Thinking about all that wasted energy…

That’s one of the things that most annoys me about people in general. It annoys me that we have a general tendency to not finish what we’ve started.

At work, we go to meetings where we brainstorm and throw out ideas about how we can make things better. And then you know what happens?

Nothing.

Nothing happens. We go back to our usual day and function as we normally do.

In our personal lives, we have dreams and goals and every once in a while, we have one of those light bulb moments. We figure out how we can change our lives for the better.

And then you know what happens?

Nothing.

Nothing happens. Or, sometimes, SOMETHING happens…for a week or two. And then we go back to our usual day and function as we normally do.

Annoying, isn’t it?

I mean, sometimes I can’t help but wonder why we even start things if we don’t push ourselves to finish.

Now sure… there ARE some things that you really shouldn’t finish…like bad books and whole tubs of ice cream.

But for the most part, we really should make every effort to finish what we’ve put into place.  

That’s one of the reasons why I admire Rotary so much.

Through their efforts to completely eradicate polio, they’ve been able to reach a 99% reduction rate.

Some organizations would be happy with that. For some organizations, that would be enough.

But not for Rotary.

They know that they’re SO CLOSE to their goal, but they recognize that they’ve still got that other 1% to go.

And that means something to them. They’re not stopping until their done.

They’re not stopping because recently there have been outbreaks in Somalia and parts of Africa that were previously polio-free.

And for that reason, as long as polio still exists, children everywhere are at risk of being affected by the disease.

Because if we experience a resurgence of polio, 10 million children could be affected throughout the next 40 years.

And we don’t want that.

Rotary and its partners in the global initiative have already put so much work and effort into helping this great cause. They’ve helped immunize 2.5 billion children – yes – BILLION, and as a result, they’ve prevented more than 10 million children worldwide from being affected by polio.

So now it’s time to finish what they’ve started.

Now it’s time to tackle that last 1%…and they’re committed to doing so.

So today, I’m making the same commitment to finish the things that I’ve started. Or at the very least, to give these things my all.

Because if everyone were to leave their efforts unfinished, what would we really accomplish as a society? How would we make life better?

We’re creative, we’re passionate, and we’re too full of potential to let it go to waste.

So make things happen.

Finish what you’ve started or start something worth finishing.

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Guest Post: Make the Most of Your Professional Life This Summer

6 Aug

imagesCAJ6VFKV

Today’s guest post was written by Lindsey Sampson. Even though the summer’s almost over (and I kind of want to cry), she shares with us a few things that we can all do during these last couple of weeks to better prepare ourselves for career success in the fall.

I like to think of summer as a time to re-charge. I use this time to think, reflect, and drink margaritas.

Here’s what Lindsey suggests we do…

*************************************************************************************

What are your plans this summer? I plan to read on the beach and master the art of the 11am brunch. Why? Because YOLO, that’s why. But it might be time to add a couple of things to the summer plan list. YOLO is great and all, but you know what else is great? Employment. Here are a couple of tips to help you get the most out of your summer.

Look at your life, look at your choices. Instead of thinking about what shade of coral you should paint your toenails this week, take a solid amount of time to sit in a beach chair and think about your life. Who are you and what do you love to do? It may seem like a difficult and scary question, but exploring your own sources of happiness is crucial.

Go for it! Make a list of the things that make you tick. What makes you feel like the best, most productive, most authentic you? Maybe you feel the best when you blog, or make music, or teach someone something new. Feel free to just brainstorm, but it helps to write it down so you can go back and reference it when you need a little inspiration.

Take action. Once you’re done thinking about your life (see what I did there?), make some small changes towards self-improvement this summer. Do things this summer just for you because you deserve it.

Go for it! Do you feel like a hot mess a lot of the time? Clean out your closet, organize your purse, or invest in a little black book to schedule your week efficiently. Do you feel overworked and burnt out? Treat yo’self and plan a date night with you and your Netflix queue.

Work on your personal brand. If I hear one more person talk about personal branding, I’m going to do some scary things with those toothpick umbrellas they put in drinks when it’s hot. But everyone is taking about it because it can be a huge asset to your professional life. The more you know yourself (see #1), the easier it will be to identify your personal brand.

Go for it! Establish yourself as a thought leader in your industry by starting a blog or engaging other industry professionals on Twitter. Boost your LinkedIn profile by uploading an up-to-date photo and asking for a recommendation or two.

Take steps towards your dream job. If you already have your dream job, good for you, but please go away. You’re making the rest of us feel bad. If you have a dream job in mind, take a step this summer in the direction of your dreams. No one is going to do it for you, and now is the perfect time.

Go for it! Make a networking sheet – list everyone in your professional network, what they do, where they work, and how you met them. Leverage this network to get you closer to your dream job. If you don’t already have a career crush, find one, and then ask him or her out for coffee or conduct an informational interview. Boost your resume by taking a design class or learning HTML online.

This summer, it’s time to feel awesome and be awesome. Go after what you want. Take steps towards your future because it is yours to create. Be assertive and be amazing just because you can.

Lindsey Sampson is a writer, explorer, and enthusiastic lover of words. She is studying International Affairs and Social Entrepreneurship at Northeastern University in Boston. Find her on Twitter at @lindseygsampson and check out her blog at www.moreawesomer.wordpress.com!

How To Be Rich in Your 20s

23 Jul

piggy_bank_8881

Most twenty-somethings have no money. Actually, most thirty-somethings are pretty broke these days too.

It’s always been a goal of mine, to be financially stable. Probably because I’ve known way too many people who’ve struggled with money issues.

To feel like you’re drowning every day? Um, that can’t be fun.

So that’s why debt and I are not friends.

I’m extremely fortunate to not owe any money. Believe me, I know how lucky I am. But that didn’t entirely happen by accident.

Instead, it’s taken a series of smart and sometimes really difficult decisions to get to where I’m at, financially.

So I figured it’d be nice share a few tactics that I’ve used over the past few years to save money. Because if you strategize and prioritize correctly, you really can be rich in your twenties.

1.    Trick Yourself Into Thinking You’re Poor

I lie to myself every day. I make a certain amount of money, but I pretend that I make a whole lot less. And you know what happens when I pretend that I make a whole lot less? I SPEND a whole lot less. And then…there’s a whole lot MORE in my bank account.

So how do you trick yourself into thinking you’re poor? Automatically deduct a certain amount of money from your paychecks each month and send that money to a separate checking/savings account. Then, forget about it. That’s your emergency fund. It can also be your travel fund. But it’s not money that you count on every month, which is good, because you don’t end up spending it on dumb things.

 2. Start the “No-Lunch-at-Work” Diet

Okay, no…I’m not talking about starving yourself. You really should eat at work. Several times. But you shouldn’t BUY lunch at work. Not for $10 a meal. Wake up five minutes early every day and pack your lunch. Or, have a 10-minute dance party before bed and make your breakfast AND lunch. I get mad at my man-friend because he doesn’t do this. And he wastes a lot of money. You know what happens when you eat a $12 burger for lunch every day? You spend $60 a week to gain 5 pounds.

3. Have Ugly Nails

You don’t need a mani/pedi every week. A mani/pedi will easily cost you $40. You don’t need to spend $40 a week-or even every TWO weeks- on your nails. Go to a drug store, buy a bottle of nail polish, and do your nails yourself. Sure, I don’t have THE BEST looking nails, but I DO have $40 more in my pocket every week. And that makes me happy.

 4. Don’t Be an Alcoholic

I don’t think I need to explain this one. I live in Miami. In South Beach, drinks are $17. Just looking at that price makes me want to vomit.

 5. Say Goodbye to Impulse Shopping

I try really hard to avoid impulse shopping. And I do a really good job, but the Internet…it’s so tempting! In 2.5 seconds, I can order pretty much anything that I want. That’s kind of scary.

Before buying anything, I like to wait a couple of days. I’ll see something that I want, sure. But I don’t buy it before thinking about it. If two days later I don’t have the same need for that thing that I wanted so badly, I don’t buy it. And that saves me a lot of money.

Because a lot of times, we see something and we’re like, “OMG this is so pretty I NEED to have it!!!”  *Click*… *Swipe*…purchased. Then, two days later, we look at those new headphones we spent $250 on, and we want to cry.

6. Take As Much Money As You Can From Your Employer

No, don’t steal from your job. That’s bad. But if your employer offers to match your retirement in any way at all, make sure that you’re getting the maximum matching dollar amount possible. Yes, it means that your paycheck will be a little smaller if you’re putting away more money for retirement. But it’s worth it in the long run. You don’t want to be 65 years old and still working. That would be awful.

7. Have a Tiny Closet

The worst possible investment you can make is on new clothes. Sure, you need clothes, but you don’t need a new outfit every week. If you want to save money but you’re one of those “I-can’t-be-seen-in-the-same-outfit-twice” kind of people, you have two options. You can:

     a. stop posting pictures on Facebook, or

     b. stop going to social functions.

If you don’t like those options, then enjoy your trips to the mall and embrace the fact that a huge chunk of your wallet is going on clothes that you’ll likely throw away a year from now.

The tinier your closet, the bigger your wallet. Unless you only shop at high-end stores, in which case, I have nothing more to say.

So there you have it! Just a few ideas to help you be rich in your twenties. Any other suggestions?

A Book For Every Twenty-Something: 101 Secrets for Your Twenties

15 Jul

101 secrets

Paul Angone, creator of All Groan Up, just released his first book… 101 Secrets for Your Twenties.

I’ve been following Paul’s blog for a while now, so when I heard about his book, I knew I had to read it ASAP.

Because he’s awesome.

So I DID read it and I’m really glad that I did. I only wish that I had read this 3 years ago…that would have been great.

Below are a few of my favorite “secrets” from the book, and how I feel about them.

#2: The possibility for greatness and embarrassment both exist in the same space. If you’re not willing to be embarrassed, you’re probably not willing to be great.

In order to be great, you’re going to have to take risks. And when you take risks, it’s likely that you’ll fail. And when you fail, it can be really embarrassing. It sucks, I know. But on the flip side, the complete opposite can happen. You can NOT fail and achieve awesome things. So understand this going into any situation and embrace it. Understand that the possibility for embarrassment and greatness go hand-in-hand. And usually, that potential for embarrassment is totally worth it.

#4: Your 20s are about having the courage to write a frightful first draft.

Did you understand what you just read? FIRST draft. Not FINAL PUBLISHED draft. When we’re in our twenties, we tend to think that everything will be perfect. Especially those of us OCD over-achievers.We’re going to graduate college and land our dream jobs and have everything figured out. But that’s not how it happens. In our twenties we just start working on these things. It’s a first draft. Our lives will be tweaked and reviewed and edited to perfection. But that takes time…and it’s okay.

#6: Life will never feel like it’s supposed to.

If there’s one thing that I struggle with, it’s this. I really shouldn’t have watched so many Disney movies growing up. I really shouldn’t have watched ANY movies growing up. Growing up, we’re exposed to movies and books and songs that fool us into believing that life is supposed to feel a certain way. And then, when life doesn’t turn out to be as awesome as we thought it’d be, we’ve severely disappointed. When we find ourselves not working at Facebook or Google, we feel like we’ve somehow failed. But life will never feel like it’s “supposed to”, because there IS NO “supposed to”, because there’s no ONE way to live life. So give up that fantasy and you’ll be a whole lot happier.

#34: Sometimes the most proactive thing you can do is De-Plug.

Turn it off. Everything. Phone. Computer. Ipad. Ipod. Everything. Go take a nap.

You need some time to be alone with your thoughts. You need some time to think. Or not think. Whatever you want to do. Sometimes you just need to unwind so that you can rest and catch up. And when you do this, you’ll find yourself with a lot more energy.

#36: Your 20s might be less about finding out what you want to do, and more about finding what you DO NOT want to do.

You don’t know exactly what you want to do. Congratulations! Welcome to the club. I am the president. I may not have an exact idea of what I want to do, but I definitely have an idea of the kinds of things I DO NOT want to do. And I’ve learned that over the course of the past four years. With every job that I’ve taken, I’ve come closer to understanding what I want to do with my life. But I’ve only understood that by trying different things. By experimenting with different opportunities, I’ve discovered that there are a certain things that I DO NOT LIKE and DO NOT WANT TO DO. And for that, I am thankful.

So try things. Try lots of things. And figure out if you like them. Every time you discover something that you DON’T like, you’re that much closer to narrowing down your interests and figuring out what you DO want to do.

If you want to read more secrets, you can buy Paul’s book on Amazon or at Barnes & Noble.

I’m not even kidding. Every 20-something needs this book! So if you know anyone in their twenties, buy it for them. If you have no money or just don’t like them enough to spend money on them, tell them about it. Because it’ll make a difference in their life!

When we’re in our twenties, we kind of have no clue what we’re doing.

That’s obvious.

BUT THIS WILL HELP!

Paul is a great writer who offers down-to-earth, no-BS advice for anyone who’s feeling a little lost and confused.

So do yourself a favor and take the time to read it.

It’s a quick read, and could very likely save you years of therapy.

And in case you’re not aware, therapy is VERY expensive.

***Paul and his publisher have been nice enough to host a give-away of the book on this site. Leave a comment below for a chance to win a free copy of 101 Secrets for Your Twenties.

Procrastination In Our Twenties & Why We Need To End It

27 Jun
ayearfromnow
 
I save EVERYTHING for the last possible minute.
 
And so the award for world’s biggest procrastinator goes to…ME!
 
It’s a terrible habbit, I know.
 
But I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately, and I’ve come to the conclusion that we’re all kind of procrastinators. It almost seems as if society’s making the very act of procrastination quite acceptable.
 
Especially for us twenty-somethings.
 
We’re told a lie repeatedly…here it goes…
 
There’s plenty of time!  Don’t be in a rush!
 
We’re in our twenties…we have our whole lives ahead of us…no need to be in a hurry.
 
But here’s the thing…
 
When we think that we have plenty of time, we tend to do nothing.
 
Think about it…when we know that we have a week before that paper is due, we sit at home watching 100 episodes of How I Met Your Mother. Imagine what happens when whe think that we have our WHOLE LIVES to do something, with no deadline in sight. At what point do we actually get up and write that paper? At what point do we actually start?
 
Think about all the ideas you’ve ever had.
 
How many of them have you actually made happen?
 
When I graduated college, I had so many dreams. I had so many ideas.
 
 I had so much that I wanted to accomplish.
 
And even today, there are still so many things that I say I want to do.
 
Write a book.
 
Take a month-long vacation to Europe.
 
Change careers.
 
But for how long have I been saying that I want to do these things?
 
For a LONG TIME.
 
And yet, nothing’s happened.
 
Because I keep convincing myself that I have my whole life to do these things.  
 
***
  
So at what point do we stop with all the talk and actually make things happen?
 
I really hope it’s soon.
 
Meg Jay, author of The Defining Decade, argues the same principle in her book, which I highly recommend to anyone in their twenties. Basically, she argues that people in their twenties have been convinced by society that it’s okay to delay adulthood. 30 is the new 20! 40 is the new 30! So does that mean that we get an extra 10 years to do nothing? Because I’m not a fan of that.
 
We’ve been programed to think that we don’t have to make decisions. Not now, at least. We don’t have to start thinking about marriage. We don’t have to start thinking about a serious career. We don’t have to start thinking about buying a house. And why? Because we have our whole lives to think about those things!
 
Well, how about we actually start living our lives? How about we actually start making decisions?
 
How about we actually start making things happen?
 
Because yes, it’s a lot easier to procrastinate.
 
It’s a lot easier to relax, and watch How I Met Your Mother.
 
But if you don’t start making moves now, you’re going to regret it later.
 
You’ll wake up 10 years from now and you’ll realize that all those things you wanted to do…you haven’t done them.
 
And that trip you wanted to take… you haven’t taken it.
 
And you’ll be sad.
 
Because you’ll feel like you’ve wasted a whole lot of time.
 
Then, you’ll get discouraged.
 
Then slowly, and sometimes even without realizing it, you’ll give up on your dreams.
 
Then slowly, you’ll accept that you never accomplished those things that you once wanted so badly.
 
So let’s not let that happen.
 
Stop procrastinating, and get to it.
  
Those things that you want, you can have them.
 
What’s stopping you?
 
makethingshappen

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